I love these photos of Noah. He loves to put his stuffed animals in Jonah's Wingbo swing. He also loves being "King of the toys" as you see in the photo where he has dumped everything in his toy basket out around him.

Cute photo of Grandpa playing with the boys.

Today we drove Grandpa up to Kernville. We walked around the empty Antique shops (I planned it that way as we had the boys with us) and had an early dinner at a local Italian restaurant. After, I dropped Grandpa off at the Kern River Inn Bed & Breakfast (photo below of cottage) to enjoy a night all to himself. After all, Grandpa deserves a break too!

Just a quick posting. We met with Dr. Purdy this morning. After examining both boys he did say he see enamel damage due to all their meds, prematurity, etc. At this point he did not notice any decay so he said we'll check again in six months. He said Jonah is at most risk for needing caps on his teeth because his teeth are worse off but Noah may need caps too. So for now we are to watch and make sure we don't notice anything worsening and plan to see the doctor again in six months.

New glasses! Jonah is adjusting to his glasses which we finally got today. He seemed to take well at first but he is starting to reach his fingers up and try to pull them off. They may be a bit loose but we're giving it the night to see how he does.

Tomorrow we go to the dental specialist for both boys. I will post what he says about the situation with their teeth.

My dad and I have a cake decorating class tonight. It will be nice to get out and take a break! Dad has the boys.

Photos of beautiful San Francisco (I included one of me in front of a Ghandi statue as he is someone who I greatly admire).

Although I plan to post quickly about San Francisco I think the most exciting thing that happened today is that my dad said Jonah has been saying "Mom" all afternoon and evening. He first said it Friday and Shane and I were in shock. Granted, we know he isn't quite aware of the meaning but how exciting nonetheless!

If I had more time I would put together some poetry (I love to write) about our lovely day in San Francisco but these are a few thoughts I collected, or things noticed that brought thoughts to me:

Farmer Market, fresh fruit, flowers, preserves
Smell of incense, cold wind and salty bay water
Music, all kinds, violins at the pier, an old gentleman playing clarinet and selling jazz
World Awareness: two men speak at curbside about starvation in Africa and the epidemic it is as if it were normal conversation, the same as good morning and how are you?
Rolling streets and sidewalks, laid out as if by laziness or maybe just a convenient plan that required less work, exhausting to climb
The Golden Gate Bridge: Absolute majesty
Lonely Alcatraz, empty, void and full of stories I care not to know
Disappointment and exploitation: two streets devoted to strip clubs, such a sore in the middle of this beautiful city, why?
Beautiful people everywhere, young people, young couples lost in endless possibilities with undefined futures
Oceanside, open waves of blue
Rain: stop and go, sometimes strong and other times gentle

What a beautiful day and what a beautiful city. I will post photos later.

Tomorrow we leave for San Francisco after dinner but tonight I am feeling sentimental and wanted to post once more before the weekend.

I have been trying to do meditative practices at bed time to think through all that is happening in our lives, especially with the boys and tonight I could not help but think of all the wonderful things they are doing and what blessings they are to those around them. I am trying to focus on the positive and celebrate the many things that they are doing vs. all that may not yet be happening.

I ran across the blog of a fellow micro-preemie mom (also has twin boys) and I really appreciated that she takes the time to periodically write notes to her sons on her site to let them know her feelings for them at that time. I felt inspired tonight to do something similar.

Dear Jonah,

I am so proud of you. Just today I was holding you and you were trying very hard to hold yourself upright so you could see all that was happening around you. You have such an infectious little smile. It truly warms the heart of many. You have just recently started babbling and trying so very hard to mimick what we say to you. You are such a happy, loving child. I could not help but think tonight of what a blessing you are to those around you, especially our family. You teach us every day the importance of loving life and the simple things, of smiling and of giving every day a chance to be good. You have experienced more pain and surgeries then most will ever know in an entire lifetime, your trials have been unimaginable to many yet every morning you greet us with a smile, a beautiful laugh and an excitement to start a new day. You do not let your challenges overcome you, yes, I can see you struggle to use your little body and can see the frustration at times for not having the capacity to easily do the things that so many take for granted. Even so, it does not stop you from enjoying the small and pure things that life has to offer. I can only hope to live up to your great example. I know God has given you a choice spirit so that you can teach others the importance of compassion and empathy, especially in a world were both are so lacking. I wish I could take away the apathy and potential cruelty that others may throw your way but I know God loves you and I and that he will protect us both. I also know that in the end even the hardest of people will learn and know that within your imperfect body lies the most virtuous and innocent of souls. Yes, I do believe that if not in the moment at some time in life even those that do not understand will come to know that you and others with similar disabilities have the greatest of all gifts and that is the purity that only comes with being close to the spirit of God at all times. I pray for you always as well as myself that I will be able to be the Mother that you will need and that I will be close to God at all times so that I can see the miracles that will take place as you go through life.

I will love you always,

Your mother, Michelle


To my vivacious, beautiful son Noah,

Every day I see you growing. Your beautiful brown eyes which remind me of your daddy look so curiously at the world around and your face brightens at the newness of all that surrounds you. I truly think I have never felt such joy then when I see you discover something for the first time. Your first, shaky steps with me walking behind you thrilled my heart more then any other treasure in the world. Your constant exclamations to the world by way of your endless chatter fill our home with such spirit that I think our lives must have been so empty before you came. You are ever aware of your brother and love him. He makes you laugh and you are always by his side. I know you both have a special bond that only two babies who have gone through such much can have. I already sense that you will be a great protector of your brother through life. He will be blessed to be your brother. Your special spirit is three times the size of your little body and although small for your age, your determination to be into and a part of everything pushes aside anything standing in your way. You love people, you are curious and watchful but quick to smile and engage. I sense that you will be a great leader and people will look up to you and that you will have a great love for those in your life. I love you and love this time in your life, every day is a new adventure where you find something new to conquer or enjoy.

I look forward to seeing all the great things that the future holds for you.

My heart is with you,

Your mother, Michelle

Poor Jonah is starting another ear infection! I was absolutely shocked as I thought perhaps maybe Noah was starting up with another. He has been fussy the past two nights and last night he woke up several times throughout the night fussing but Noah's ears checked out fine. So Jonah started with a short 5-day course of antibiotics and goes in for another check-up next week. Noah's infection is both yeast as well as eczema. So we are changing bath soup to a mild Dove bar soap and starting Noah on a Nyastatin and hydrocortisone cream mix. Hopefully in a week we'll finally see things clear up. Bless his heart.

So far San Francisco is still on! Shane will still have to take it easy so not a lot of walking will be possible but it should still be fun.

Happy Valentine's Day to everyone!

I am almost afraid to post this as I feel like tomorrow everything could change but for Valentine's Shane found a wonderful hotel deal in San Francisco! I am so excited as I have only ever flown through the area, never stayed and although the forecast calls for rain we will take our chances!

Even tonight Jonah was being abnormally fussy and I was thinking, "Please no, please don't get sick or have any problem that may prevent our nice little get away (hopefully that doesn't sound too selfish)." Hopefully I am just being paranoid. My sweet father has agreed to watch the boys from Friday evening until Sunday afternoon while we go enjoy ourselves. Seriously, who could ask for a better Grandpa and friend? I can definitely say we would not make it without him. He has been such a help and important part of Noah and Jonah's lives. They are lucky to call him Grandpa. Also, Grandma Hanna left today and we want her to know how much she will be missed. She also has sacrificed so much to help out with our family and flew down here last minute to help with the boys so Shane could rest. We are blessed with good family!

This week Jonah has continued to have a few more vomiting episodes then I would like but I really think his allergies are acting up and tomorrow both boys go in for their Synergis shots so the doctor is also going to take a look at Jonah and discuss maybe changing the Tavist he is on. Noah's yeast infection has STILL not cleared up (after over a month and two different ointments plus oral Nyastatin) so that will be reviewed too. The dental appointment was put off as we just switched insurances and Aetna forgot to get my name as well as the boys added to the policy (nice). We found out when the specialist's office called today to say that the insurance was saying neither of the boys was showing coverage. Fun, fun. So that appointment has been delayed until they get their paperwork straightened out but hopefully we'll get both in within the next week.

For now, I am signing off and dreaming of this weekend in San Francisco.................

More video of our family party last night...